8.7.25

 8.7.25

Duoloxitine 20 mg

Here I am again, 3 years later. I successfully weened off of lamotrigine and now I am attempting to do the same with cymbalta, the last drug I am on. It's been fairly smooth for a while but I am starting to feel side effects creeping in. I'm having anxious mornings again, and feeling fear manifest in my body like stored electricity and clamps on my muscles. The only things that help the pain are exercise, AA meetings, and sometimes praying. Everything inside of me wants to throw it all away and just run. Run back to NC, run away from the work I need to do in AA and give up. This is old behavior. 

I've weathered the storm before. I feel it's no coincidence that I found this old weening blog almost exactly 3 years later. And realized that 4 years ago was when we found Dad. My body is remembering the trauma involved with this time of year on multiple levels. I have to be kind to it and patient with myself. I have to accept my feelings as they arise. And just let them pass through and know that it's fo a reason and I will come out the other side stronger and able to help someone else with this. 

All will be well All will be well All will be well and God is in charge. 

Symptoms

Weeping, panic, restlessness, brain fog